True you only die once, and to be able to choose the style of your death can hold an appeal to some, but I believe holding it up as an example is just a coping mechanism for accepting that Susan is truly gone and that it was her own choice. The reality is once you are gone, you are no longer able to touch new lives, you live in other’s memories but most memories do fade over time. I will always regret that Susan will no longer have the opportunity to touch the lives of others as well as my own life in new and profound ways.
Susan and met the first day of 4th grade at Viola School in Mrs. Downs classroom. I was the new kid in school and from that first day Susan and I became best friends, a friendship that lasted 7 years. There is something very sacred about early formative friendships. I have some strong memories of those years; brushing each other’s hair for hours, shopping for ugly 70s cloths followed by 80s preppy cloths (if you can believe it)! Spending the afternoon with Susan, her sister Katie and one of our 5th grade teachers the day her father died. Our first trip into New York City on our own, without parents. Our first rock concert. Camping in Peace Meadow with our friend Hillary Shay, eating peanut M&Ms and dreaming of what we would do with our lives – what we would be who we would marry (at that time Susan was to be a lawyer!) I also live with the sad memories of our friendship dying.
Over the past years I have often thought about running into Susan and how that would be. The fact that I can no longer wonder about that truly saddens me
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